One of those...Seasons

Ever have "one of those weeks" where nothing seems to go right, all you can do is doubt yourself, you're so busy that you start questioning what your priorities are, and where all you want to do is crawl into bed and just stay there?

Yeah.  I'm there.

Except, it's been "one of those seasons" as opposed to just "one of those weeks."

I don't want to say that I'm depressed -- depression is not a topic that I take lightly or a word that I use easily.  Many members of my family have been struck by this disease and I've seen it's effects first hand -- so I don't want to diminish their experiences by using such a powerful label to describe myself.  However one thing is for certain... I am way off the beaten path that is normally "me."

And the last couple of days have really been rough.  Emotionally.  Mentally.  Confidently.  Professionally.

Just plain rough.

I've been in this mind set only once before in my life.  The summer before my senior year of college, where a break up sent my world reeling.  I lost all concept of who I was.  It was awful.  So much doubt, insecurity, fear...  Not to mention weight gain.  And I'm there again...  Priorities all twisted, life feeling somewhat upside down, the mundane day-to-day necessities even seem overwhelming.

Wah wah wah, right?
Put on your big girl panties and deal with it, Blair.

So today I began a habit that was put on the back burner -- morning Bible study after my workout.  And what a difference that made in today!  Positive attitude, confidence in my abilities and knowledge as a professional, empathy and patience.

So that was nice...  A good place to begin the re-organization of myself and my priorities.  And I pray that it's the beginning of the passing of this "season."